Grounding Tools for When You Feel Overwhelmed
When emotions feel intense, your body may respond as though something is happening right now. Trauma tells us it is all or nothing. Our goal is to find space beyond survival - when thriving feels impossible, “surthriving” gives us a way to make it through, one day at a time.
Some of these may be useful, some may not. Choose what feels useful to you.
1. Look Around
Slowly look around the room.
Notice:
5 things you can see
4 things you can touch or feel
3 things you can hear
2 things you can smell
1 thing you can taste
Take your time. Let your eyes move around the room rather than focusing intensely on one thing.
2. Get Grounded
Place both feet comfortably on the floor.
Notice:
The pressure beneath your feet
The temperature of the floor
The feeling of your shoes or socks
The support underneath you, on your back, legs, arms
Notice where you feel stable, supported, and steady.
3. Find Something Neutral
Look around and find something that feels neutral, pleasant, or interesting.
It could be:
A color you like
A piece of artwork
A plant
A window
A familiar object
Let your eyes rest there for a few moments as you allow your nervous system to orient to your surroundings.
4. Box Breathing -
Tactical breathing, also called box breathing, is a controlled breathing technique used in military and other high-stress professions to help manage the body's stress response, maintain focus, and stay composed under pressure.
The goal isn't to “make yourself calm.” It's about practicing how to slow down, stay present, and have some control when your nervous system becomes activated.
If focusing on your breath feels comfortable, try this simple paced breathing exercise:
1. Breathe IN slowly.
Take a comfortable breath in.
2. HOLD gently (about 4 seconds)
Pause for a few seconds.
3. Breathe OUT slowly.
Let the breath leave your body in a controlled, comfortable way.
4. HOLD gently(about 4 seconds)
Pause briefly before taking your next breath.
Keep the pace comfortable and adjust or stop if you feel dizzy, lightheaded, anxious, or uncomfortable.
Remind yourself:
“I can slow down. I am here. I am safe in this moment.”
If focusing on your breathing makes you more uncomfortable, skip this exercise and choose an external grounding activity instead.
5. Get Moving
Sometimes your body needs movement rather than stillness.
Try:
Swaying your arms or body side to side
Rolling your shoulders
Stretching upward gently as tall as you can, then releasing back down again
Taking a slow walk
Gently shifting your weight from one foot to the other
Another resource: Look up Qigong exercises - repetitive, gentle bodily movements can signal to our nervous system to enter the “rest and digest” stage that allows our body functions to continue. Stress disrupts these functions and keeps us in a fight and flight state. The more we can bring in brief moments of “rest and digest”, the more energy we have towards healing.
When Grounding Feels Difficult
You don't have to force yourself to calm down. Sometimes the goal is simply to stay where we are without rushing to the next thing or responding to sensations of urgency.
If an exercise makes you feel more overwhelmed, disconnected, panicky, or uncomfortable, stop and try something different. We are trying to rebuild self trust - not forcing anything or saying “I should” to ourselves.
You can:
Open your eyes
Look around the room
Name objects around you
Stand up or move
Feel your feet on the floor
Talk to someone you trust
Return to an activity that feels familiar and safe
A gentle reminder
I am doing the best I can right now.
I can slow down.
I can give myself compassion.
I can choose what I need next.
